I was looking through some of our reader contributions, and came across this little gem over five times:
“Squatting should be added to the list.”
“Squatting. It’s a true continent-wide asian favorite.”
“Why isn’t squatting on the list?”
and “Will I save money on car insurance by squatting?”
Asians have developed many techniques to accommodate the strenuous activities that they are accustomed to in their native countries. This includes bending over to pick rice in rice patties, strengthening their arms to sell food to pedestrians, or just sitting back to enjoy the little things in life like eating bowls of rice. However, somewhere down the line, Asians figured that they couldn’t do all of these activities standing up for extended amounts of time. Hence, the Squat was born. After reading this post, you will know what the asian squat is, where it comes from, and most importantly, why it’s effective.
As mentioned in an award-winning documentary by Daniel Hsia (How to do the Asian Squat [2002]), the Asian Squat is much different from other squats. Originating in India, the squat made its way to China, where asians figured that it was the ideal way to eat rice and be ready to defecate at any given time. Given these uses, the squat has evolved into more than just a makeshift eating position.
It is now a way of life. Asians everywhere use it when they are smoking, reading, eating, waiting, shaving, and any other gerund-verb combination you can think of. Let’s not forget the most important use of the squat, keeping the asian bottom cleaner while using the bathroom (which in many asian countries is just a hole in the ground with running water). Think about all the crap that accumulates when the cheeks are so close together (like in the american toilet). This way, asians are able to be quite economical in their choice of toiletries.
As asians moved to other parts of the world and grew more refined in their mannerisms, they began to shift away from their use of the Asian Squat, calling it “mundane” and “un-professional.” Modern science has proven the squat as an efficient posture that reduces pain on the patellar(knee) tendon. In addition, the asian is now more balanced because their center of gravity is above the feet, and the heels snuggly contour the ground. For that reason, it has risen to prominence once more in only the last 200 years.
The Asian Squat allows asians to play poker without a table, eat without a table, and do pretty much everything without the need for man’s inventions. Without it, asians would be even shorter than they already are (due to improper posture), hungrier, lonelier, poorer (tables cost money too), and most importantly, tired-er (yes, I added an ER to tired). It’s a craze that’s making its way across the pacific and atlantic oceans. It’s an innovation. It’s a lifestyle. It’s the Asian Squat.
…and to whom it may concern: “Yes, it does save you money on car insurance.”
By popular demand, here’s the video documentary: How to do the Asian Squat (2002)
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11 responses so far ↓
1 Justin // Apr 22, 2008 at 8:54 pm
lol, glad to have u back pete!
i love squatting. my non-asian friends would look at me with a painful look in their face like, “doesn’t that hurt?” or it would hurt them if they tried
2 nanheyangrouchuan // Apr 22, 2008 at 10:47 pm
The Asian squat works well in theory for taking a dump and is good in the woods, but in public restrooms the result is usually “splatter” on the walls, the floor and the toilet.
3 YASPY Chick // Apr 23, 2008 at 7:18 am
I don’t know how to squat the Asian way!
4 LG // Apr 23, 2008 at 9:43 am
LOVE LOVE LOVE this post. especially the video.
5 solong // Apr 23, 2008 at 6:47 pm
LOL I love this entry and I love the squat!
6 Lana // Apr 24, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Those toilets freak me out! I couldn’t do it.
7 takka // May 8, 2008 at 5:24 pm
i am asian…
but i can’t do a asain squat……
what a shame…lol
8 kevin // May 12, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Growing up in SE Asia accustomed me to the Asian Squat, but as an Oklahoma Native, please allow me to point out that the Asian Squat is not exclusively Asian, but is derived from other cultural determinants, and may be observed among North Americans as well. Watch the motion picture made of Steinbeck’s Grapes of Wrath, and you will observe accurate renditions of 1930’s Oklahoma Peasants performing the Oklahoma Squat with no conception that later generations will assume that it is limited to Asia.
Cowboys, Indians, and Irish railroad laborers did it too. And probably Henry David Thoreau.
9 Natural // May 24, 2008 at 7:35 pm
I can’t do the damn asian squat….try hard as I may, I seriously can’t. I always tip over..
10 Sam // May 25, 2008 at 8:53 am
Not all asians squat, here in Hong Kong almost no one squats (unless they’re from China)
11 jafm // Jun 24, 2008 at 9:24 am
Awesome video! (Yeah, I can do both squats–Japanese wannabe)
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